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Sunday July 9, 2017

At work there are two Nigels and both have saved my bacon on more than one occasion. Today is the day my golf cart arrives. I last saw the golf cart and my 10,000 Riyals on Thursday, July 6. I left my money with people I just met and an arrangement to have my cart delivered on Sunday, no bill of sale, no receipt, just blind faith that it would all some how happen. Inshallah.

Sunday evening, I get a message from Doug that the tow truck driver has shown up and he is making sure the cart gets properly installed on the back of the tow truck. He sends me a picture and the drivers number and that’s it-I just have to wait for it to arrive…if only it were that simple.

Here is the nice pic. from Doug showing my new cart riding off into the sunset.

So…since I am a facilitator and instructional designer I thought I would have a little fun with the cart coordination. AND just in case any of you need to move a club (golf) cart from one community to the next you will now have the process nicely laid out for you to carefully follow.

HOW TO JOB AID: GETTING A CLUB CART OFF CAMP

To get a golf cart from one community to the next the user must complete the following procedure.

1. Go to the main security gate
2. Greet the tow truck driver at the gate
3. Complete the mandatory paperwork
4. Get paperwork approved
5. Escort tow truck driver to your home-*You are 100% responsible for the driver while he is on camp-if he gets into an accident it will go against your PEP
6. Ensure driver properly secures the cart to the bed of the truck
7. Follow the driver back to the security gate
8. Complete paperwork to allow the golf cart off of camp
9. Wave goodbye to the cart
10. Pray it gets to its destination, inshallah. Go home…

HOW TO JOB AID: GETTING A CLUB CART ON CAMP ‘IF YOU ARE A WOMAN’

To get a club cart on camp a woman must follow this procedure.

1. Call a male friend and have them take you to the security gate
2. Don’t provide any specific time – just give them a 4-5 hour window and say inshallah
3. Wait at home for the driver to call you on your cell and tell you he is lost
4. Frantically figure out how to send your location to him via What’sapp
5. Text your friend back to say you still don’t know when the driver will be here
6. Wait for the security gate to call you on your HOUSE phone! This is very important. Do NOT try to skip this step or you will need to repeat steps 1-5 on another day
7. After security calls you, text your friend and tell them the cart has arrived
8. Wait 10-15 minutes-inshallah-for your friend
9. Throw on your abaya (very important)
10. Arrive at the gate 20-25 minutes after security called you
11. Get super excited because you see your cart sitting on the flat bed truck on the “other side of the perimeter” and think almost home!
12. Show your ID to the security officers
13. Have male colleague ask if the female colleague is allowed to drive the cart onto the compound
14. Watch as the security officer laughs and says “NO, she not drive, NO. Over here-okay, over there (points to other side of barriers) NO.”
15. Let heart sink (just a bit)
16. Cross to the “other side” and look for the driver. If its the middle of night and pitch black-look even harder
17. Discover driver in the visitor center filling out paperwork
18. Stay outside and sweat profusely in your abaya in 115° heat at 8 PM at night
19. Jump for joy when male colleague and driver show up and the driver FINALLY drives the cart through the barriers
20. Go to the “other side” and meet the driver and two security guards who inspect the vehicle
21. Answer all questions the security officer has about HOW to purchase a club cart, where it came from, how much it cost, how long it took, etc. Confirm the price you paid was in riyals and not dollars
22. Jump when the driver drops the ramps on the concrete in the dark of night!
23. Look dumbfounded when the two security guards and driver say you can now drive the club cart OFF the flat bed truck!

I wish I had videoed this event, but to tell you the truth I am not certain it would have been allowed because they are very strict on what can be in photos, videos, etc. here. BUT trust me, Nigel was a hero and did a bang up job driving that cart off the flatbed. When they told me okay drive it off, I looked at them and said, no. I looked to the driver who shook his head and said no, the two security officers said the same. The only option left was poor Nigel, otherwise my cart might still be on the flatbed. Now, Nigel had NEVER driven a gas powered golf cart until that very night! Gas powered carts are not as smooth as electric, the pedal is a bit touchy and it tends to lurch when you press it. Luckily the driver kept the tow hook on the cart the whole time Nigel was driving it off the flatbed or he might have ended up in the gulf!

As a woman I was shooed away while the two guards attempted to navigate Nigel off the flatbed. Its okay for me drive it off but its not okay for me to navigate? Nigel did great until one of the guards told Nigel to turn the wheel in the wrong direction and the right two cart wheels straddled the ramp-1/2 on and 1/2 off! I couldn’t believe what I was seeing! They realized what was happening and tried to move the ramp under the wheels-YEAH RIGHT!  The driver tightened the tow hook and Nigel thankfully managed to drive the damn thing off in one piece! I could finally breathe!

I was now given permission to get in my cart! I paid the driver, said many shukrans and waved goodbye. That night I drove home in my cart for the very first time! The hot wind whipping through the matted hair that was now sticking to my head and face felt stupidly liberating. I proudly drove up to the second security gate and showed the guard my ID-he did NOT seem amused at seeing me but waved me through any way. I drove home and parked my cart in a real parking spot! Life was good in Saudi today…very, very good 🙂

Sunday July 9th

This was always one of my favorite books to read to the kids when they were growing up. It sums up so many things in life…one action leading to another. This is how my story unfolds.

My accommodations are not the best in world, so to cheer myself up I decided to hire a painter to come in and give my new place a fresh coat of paint! One, because my place was all ‘blah’ white-white walls and white baseboards. And two, I needed to hide the tell-tale signs of the gecko tracks that were left over from the “Nigel saves the day” incident. I selected a color called “limestone” a lovely pale grey that would compliment my swell (NOT) tan tile floors and the 1970’s yellow bathroom tile! Yes, that’s right, my bathtub is surrounded in yellow tile that looks like it is straight from a segment of the Brady Bunch. It took the painters 2-days to paint the whole townhouse, top to bottom. Once it was finished it looked spectacular…but, I needed a new shower curtain.

The new shower curtain the housing office provided at move-in…just wasn’t quite right so I had to look for a new one. Luckily part of my new hire orientation included a shopping trip to Dhahran! Cash in hand, I was on a mission to find a yellow and grey shower curtain. Two stores into the trip I found what I was looking for- a pretty paisley print curtain in grey/yellow and white-an unbelievable find here in the Middle East considering the most popular color here is deep purple and pink! See below of what NOT to buy here!

I am so excited when I get home! I have a new shower curtain to install, I got a microwave and my golf cart is arriving from Dhahran in less than 1 hour. I run upstairs and proceed to install my shower curtain. At first I take my time slipping all the new plastic clips (that was ALL I could find!) in the holes of the shower curtain. After a couple of goes at this I decided it was taking too long so I decided to perform this action while standing on the side of the tub.  I proceed to put the curtain up while hooking it to the rod at the same time…and that is when it happened. I dropped a plastic clip in the toilet. UGH! I continue putting up the shower curtain and decide fish it out of the toilet after I am done. Only I didn’t fish it out-I forgot because I was to busy admiring how well the curtain fit into my new color scheme and how I was able to take ugly 70’s tile and make it look new again.

A few hours later I am off to pick up the golf cart. Getting ready for bed the clip is outta sight – outta mind. Next morning getting ready for work and uh-oh why isn’t the toilet flushing? OMG! I forgot about the clip! NO I say to myself! I have NO plunger, NO wire hanger and NO time to fish for a stupid shower curtain clip. Off to work I go, I will call maintenance after work.

I skip my pre-paid PIYO class because I need my one and only toilet and it usually takes maintenance hours to respond to a call…sure enough a 4:15 call turns into a 6:05 visit. Two guys arrive at my house, one young (early 20’s) one old (late 50s) carrying something in a plastic bag- they are not dressed in a maintenance uniforms so OF COURSE I let them into my house! No seriously, they were okay and were called to fix my toilet issue but neither of them speak a lick of English. They head upstairs and I show the younger man what I dropped into the toilet-he proceeds to ROLL his eyes, sighs loudly and says something to the older man in a language that was not English or Arabic (like I could understand that one either!). But seriously…did I just see you roll your eyes? Just so you know eye rolling is the universal sign for you are a total dumb ass!

He and the other man go back and forth for a few minutes until the older man pulls a plunger out of the plastic bag and proceeds to plunge away. GREAT I am thinking…all he’s going to do it push it further down the pipe. Did they not see what was dropped and flushed down the toilet? The guy actually gets it cleared, flushed it 3 times and says its fixed and leaves. Yay!!!! I am happy, I sign the work order and off they go. Of course by Monday morning…the toilet is clogged again.

It took another maintenance call, another visit and more plunging for the issue to become what I am certain is a temporary fix. If you give a mouse a cookie…he will want a glass of milk. One gecko, one paint job, one shower curtain and one little clip…

Using Amanda’s golf cart while she was out of the country provided me with a much needed mode of transportation here on the RT camp. I am fortunate that I am within walking distance to the commissary, beach, and work…but in 110°-120° heat I am soaked in humidity (literally and it’s not pretty) by the time I walk any where. So mission number 1-was to get me some wheels! I have a few options available to me:

1. Buy a car
2. Ride a bike
3. Buy a golf cart

1- Buying a car to only drive on the compound is stupid! I am looking at investing 25,000-70,000 Riyals! The prices on the camp are ALL over the spectrum and you really have NO idea what you are getting-it’s not like they have CARFAX here or Jacobs Automotive around if something breaks! Hell, when I needed to put gas in Amanda’s golf cart the guy at the automotive shop couldn’t tell me where the gas station was -and it was next door to him!! OKAY, there is NO giant SHELL/EXXON sign. Second, I would only be able to drive it within the boundaries of these walls and I live so close to everything-it would be a waste of money. And third, everyone who has a car is willing to loan it to you (sometimes for weeks!!!) or willing to give you a ride anywhere.

2- Riding my bike will be a great option once I-1) get it and 2) the friggin heat breaks (which I am told is October). My bike is in my overseas shipment which will not arrive until the end of August. I am bringing my super cute Schwinn cruiser with a lovely basket to hold my baguettes that I get from the corner bakery and ride home through the streets of Paris (one can dream).

3- So, buy a golf cart it is.

My friends say RT reminds them of a Florida retirement community, I would have to agree. Because carts are in high demand (for putting around camp and golfing) I had a challenging time finding one on the camp. Currently, there are two for sale. One is a tricked out, red, 4 seater (the Cadillac of golf carts) for 26,000 Riyals, and the other is a an electric, topless model for 6,000 Riyals. Did I mention it is HOT here and I live in a townhouse with NO access to an outdoor electrical outlet? Neither option worked for me so I started to look in near-by communities. Let me be clear, “looking in other communities” for items for sale is not like living in Aurora CO and trying to find something for sale in Parker or from Bangor to Brewer Maine. Since I am not allowed to drive here everything is either a bus or taxi away.

The company’s biggest community is Dhahran-which is 1 hour away on a good day (which means zero traffic) and 1 1/2 hours away the rest of the 364 days a year. Dhahran is the keeper of many things related to my stay here-it is the “keeper” of the mall which sells much needed items such as Nespresso coffee capsules, it is the “keeper” of my iqama and passport! So, if you haven’t guessed by now, Dhahran is an important location and I am about 1 1/2 hours away.

I found the ‘perfect’ gas powered cart, it had the basic necessities such as a roof, windshield and was super-powered to hit speeds way beyond the 22 mph I was clocking in Amanda’s cart! Even better, it was 14,000 Riyals. The guy on the phone told me he was selling it for a friend who was leaving the kingdom and there was already another party interested. I explained my situation and offered him 15,000 Riyals for the cart-sight unseen. I know, I know…my American friends are saying WTF right now, but there is no way you can understand how it works over here. This is something that should NEVER happen in the U.S. but I am dealing with an expat…which is different-trust me. The guy said he would consider the offer but the first person still had dibs over me and he would let me know. Well later that evening he contacted me and sure enough the cart was sold under me. Oh well, that’s how it goes…or NOT.

Feeling “sorry” for me-many expats learn true empathy here in the kingdom, he told me he was going to sell his cart at the end of August when he was leaving the kingdom. However, he would part with it sooner and would sell it to me for 10,000 SAR! He sent me a picture via the “only” reliable communication channel here called What’sApp and I was sold. As we started chatting back and forth, me telling him I would take the cart and send him the money ASAP I discovered he and his wife had taught school in Colorado Springs…continuing our conversation I discovered he was born and raised in Brewer Maine…right next door to Bangor Maine and his wife is from Trenton, Maine!! He went to Brewer High, is a “Brewer Witch” and graduated from University of Maine in Orono. What a small, small world! From Maine, to Colorado, to Saudi Arabia I found a fellow Maine-ah.

I made arrangements the next day to take the bus to Dhahran (during work hours-which becomes a 5 hour trip when you calculate waiting & travel times) and he and his wife picked me up at the bus stop and drove me to their house to look at the cart.

***Seriously, at this point you may be asking why all the little details? And my answer is because NOTHING is easy here…NOTHING. You have to go through multiple security gates and check points to get to point A or B. Buses only go to certain locations and nothing is the same as it happens in the U.S. Everything is doable but it just takes hours longer.

My new expats friends and I bonded immediately over our common ground even though I am 20 years older than the both of them. They are both teachers, Doug and Kirsten,  have been here for 5 years-just enough time to get vested in the company pension plan, are ready to leave, and will spend the next year not working and traveling the world. They listened compassionately as I broke down in tears (it is seriously hard to describe what it feels like to find someone with common interests and the “same” point of reference in a foreign country)!!! I complained about the conditions, missing my family and my friends. I described the stupid obstacles and frustrations of this country and they understood-they get it, and have lived it!. Doug gave me sage advice…give it 6 months-just 6 months and things will get better. Kirsten gave me a can of clam chowder from Bar Harbor Maine, so I would be able to feel the comforts of “home” and I gave them my 10,000 Riyals and bought a golf cart! As I left, they gave me warm, and welcoming hugs-reassured me that everything would be okay-as ONLY someone who has lived through this can, and told me, “us Main-ah’s have got to stick together-ah.”

It has been a few weeks since I last posted and it’s not because there in nothing going on…it’s the exact opposite. But let’s start with the basics. In case I had not mentioned in the previous posts but I arrived to Saudi Arabia in the middle of Ramadan. So what does that mean to all my friends back home? It’s like arriving to the U.S. on Christmas Day…only it lasts for weeks! In the U.S. it’s usually 7-11 types of stores that are open while everything else is pretty much shut down especially government offices. Without government services you cannot get your iqama (work permit) and without that little tiny document, you don’t get your passport back, you don’t get a visa and you are pretty much stuck here…living in limbo. This week I have had significant milestones! Because I am so far behind on my blog, I have broke the content down into sections and I will expand on each section to let you know a bit more about some of the hillarious moments that happened with each of these milestones.

1. The government reopened on Sunday the 9th! Remember our work week is Sunday-Thursday and the weekend is Friday/Saturday.
2. Sunday my golf cart arrived!
3. Tuesday morning I finally get the email that states my iqama has been issued and is now being held in Dhahran.
4. Wednesday my 2 e-boxes arrived from the United States!
5. Thursday after checking the government online visa system every 10 minutes (for the past 2 days), at 1:03 PM I get what I have been waiting 4 weeks for…my ticket out of here…or more specially to Bahrain for some B&B

At 1:10 PM I realize I have made weekend plans with other colleagues who do not have the same freedom that I now possess and I come down off the B&B cloud called Bahrain and realize that you just can’t pick up and go in this part of the world so I am staying put for another 7 days.

In case I haven’t posted this yet, my work week is Sunday through Thursday and my weekends are Friday and Saturday. My “weekend” started off on a great note when I was confronted by one of my named geckos (Laverne or Shirley). Let me be clear-these innocent creatures freak me out! And seeing a very large one on my bathroom wall is not how I wanted to start my weekend.

When I discovered the unwanted guest I immediately sent a text to two of my work colleagues (Sherri and Nigel)…both of whom came to my rescue. Sherri came over first, she tried to catch the gecko but it immediately escaped and went under the door into the hall where I was waiting for her and let out a major scream. Nigel came over next and after what seemed liked HOURS of searching in my bedroom (the only place it could have gone since it DID NOT follow my screaming self down the stairs) decided that the poor thing was frightened and decided to leave on its own accord. I was not buying this suggestion but it was getting late and Sherri wanted to go out for dinner. So I told Nigel we had it under control and we went out to dinner.

After dinner I asked Sherri if she could scan my bedroom one more time…just in case the gecko had decided to NOT leave. We searched high and low, looking in the closet, behind the curtains, the dresser, the comforter…when Sherri calmly said to me…you need to leave. Alarmed I said…”What?! Is it in here? By my BED?!” She calmly answered again, Yes, and you need to leave. Anxiously waiting in the living room below I heard Sherri slam my bedroom door and then thump, thump, thump…minutes later Sherri appears and says “sorry, I can’t get it but its trapped in your room. I shoved your Micheal Kors dust bag under the closet door and a towel under the bedroom door. You can sleep at my place if you want?” Mortified the thing was still in my bedroom I still opted to not go to her house but sleep on my couch instead…of course she had to go up stairs and get my pillow and comforter for me.

The next morning Nigel came over with a long handled broom and with the shoe box handy after 20 minutes of loud thuds and moving furniture FINALLY had the gecko trapped. Once he got it under the box I gave him a piece of cardboard to slide under the box and he ever so carefully dragged the box across the carpet to the bedroom patio door and released the gecko…BUT not so quick-the damn thing was clinging for dear life to the top of the box and wouldn’t let go! Nigel was great…and in his lovely Capetown/British accent said…”Kate…come take a look…see here it is, it is very frightened and doesn’t want to come out!” I am seriously wrenching on the inside. Nigel shakes and shakes and it still won’t release and had to throw the box over the balcony down below (don’t worry its only 1 story) and my nemesis scurried away. Nigel saved my day.

I am still shaken up and a bit skittish. Baby steps folks…baby steps. I have only been here 3 weeks and it takes time!